Grand Turk You Say?
So if you’ve been following me for a while, you already know that I’m no longer about the Ubersoca Cruise (USC) ship life. 2016 and 2017 were enough for me, and I’m glad I got to experience it when it was unpopular. I just couldn’t put myself in a position to be surrounded by THAT many people on one ship for 5 days. I would suffocate and lose all my pleasantries. I would figuratively be the opposite of “nice.”
Me on these crowded ships…
I was shocked and amazed when USC announced that it would be going to Grand Turk for 2019. If I wasn’t on social media and someone told me that in passing, I promise you I wouldn’t have believed them. Like…USC in Grand Turk…STFU. As I clutched my pearls and gathered my soul, the first questions I asked myself were:
- Do the Grand Turk (GT) officials know what they signed up for?
- GT letting Boat 2 have jouvert on a big SUNDAY?
- Where the hell they having jouvert in GT that will fit all these people?
- Are they going to let locals buy tickets to attend jouvert?
The Master Plan
So of course after the launch, an influx of friends and IG followers came in my inbox talmbout, “See you on the boat!” “So, I guess you’re going now?” “You still boycotting?!”…LMAO. How about, “No.” “No.” And, “Half-no.” When they launched the location, I already knew I wasn’t going. I meant what I said when I said it…that ship wasn’t seeing me anytime soon. But what I did plan to do was crash TF out of jouvert. What I look like dishing out mega bucks for the cruise when I could pay a likkle $400 for a flight, get free lodging in my own damn house and find my way into jouvert for the low-low? Sheeiit.
My brain was working y’all lol.
The Brunch Excursion
Mind you, this plan was in motion before I was diagnosed with my lil BC situation. Once I got approved for my short term disability and was cleared to fly by my surgeons, I knew that I was about to make the most out of this trip. As if crashing jouvert wasn’t enough. I came up with this plan to host a brunch at the house for meh friends and them. It isn’t every day that your carnival-loving brethren touch down inna yuh homeland…so, I figured I’d let them have an authentic Turks and Caicos experience.
I rounded up the troops (the dedicated cooks in my family), started a planning chat, made some flyers, ordered wristbands, ordered foil tattoos, hired a videographer and sent out invitations (complete with threats) to ensure that the information wasn’t passed around. There were only so many people that I could accommodate and I didn’t want anyone to feel unloved. It was a decent amount of preparation and everything turned out quite well in the end. Shout out to my Brunch Excursion team!
To my amazement, the majority of my brunch guests arrived on time for the shuttle. 8 poor souls never made it off the boat for numerous reasons LMAO (don’t ask) but we gonna let them live. The hostess in me was a lil disappointed, but it meant more food and drinks for everyone else! Let me tell you, the 30+ people that did make it were tired AF. They got to the house and crashed. Most of them were in zombie mode.
My guests came in like…
Quote of the day was, “Bruh, I haven’t slept since Friday.” I was like, “Well damn, instead of ordering these chairs and the tent, I should have just ordered some of those sleeping mats the kindergarteners use at school.” I couldn’t blame them though. I know how that USC life can be. They gathered enough energy to indulge in the food, mingle with other brunchers and sip on the spirits from my Bambarra Bar. At noon, I had a shuttle come to take interested guests on a private tour around the island. 30 minutes later the rest of us headed to jouvert.
Let me just say this right quick. Wednesday’s jouvert (Boat 1) was COMPLETELY different than the one on Sunday (Boat 2). And no, I’m not just saying this because all my damn friends were on Boat 2. The vibes were just bigger and better. But, don’t let the words I just wrote fool you. Boff a dem jouverts needed work! I don’t care what some of y’all say! You know I haffi give my honest feedback. While I had a really good time, I think it could have been far better from a musical perspective. The sound, musical selection from the DJs, and artist selection all had me falling asleep and ready to curl up in the bed with a few reruns of Murder She Wrote. All yuh, please fix the line-up for the future. It’s been 4 years of the same thing. Well almost. Why y’all take Lil Rick of the jouvert line-up? That was the one thing that should have remained constant. Welp…that’s just my two cents, but other folks have been saying the same damn thing as well. Less groovy…more pace! More variety…all the soca that exists and we playing the same 10 songs on repeat. It’s never a good thing.
Well, folks. That’s all I got for ya. Biggup to Ubersoca Cruise, all guests and all the Grand Turk locals for an amazing experience with ZERO incidents! Nothing like vibes and peace! My official brunch/jouvert footage is currently being edited; however, I’ll leave you with this short, amateur feel-good recap to hold you over until then. Oh, and do check out my IGTV verbal recap HERE!